


riptide

by dizzyondreams



Series: beach au [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M, Modern AU, again i know i'm sorry, beach au, they're neighbours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-10
Updated: 2014-02-10
Packaged: 2018-01-11 21:58:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1178417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dizzyondreams/pseuds/dizzyondreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>It was a warm night. The sort of summer warmth that made the tarmac smell hot and cloying, and Jean couldn’t sleep because of the heat and the way his brain kept ticking over.</i> // Eren moves into the house opposite Jean's.</p>
            </blockquote>





	riptide

Jean lived in a tiny bungalow near the beach with his mother, father and two little sisters. His room was the attic conversion that his parents had built when his youngest sister had come along and Jean had protested sharing a room with two _girls_. It was freezing cold in the winter, and sweltering in the summer, but Jean liked it enough. It was handy for sneaking a cigarette, anyway. 

His window looked out across the narrow lane at the front and into the similar attic conversion of the house opposite. The two windows were level, but no one had lived in the house opposite for as long as Jean could remember. His friend Connie fantasised about a girl moving in opposite, a girl who forgot to close her curtains before getting changed. Jean supposed that wouldn’t be too painful if it did happen.

It was some time around the end of spring when people moved in opposite. Jean’s mother had taken the girls down the beach and his father was at work, so Jean watched the family move in on his own. There were four of them, a man, a woman, a girl who couldn’t have been their natural daughter - she looked Japanese - and a boy who looked to be about Jean’s age. The only people who lived on Jean’s lane were old people who’d moved to the coast for retirement and the rest of the houses were empty for most of the year since people rented them as holiday homes. Connie was the only person who lived near Jean and he lived a good half an hour away. Jean wondered if the boy would be going to St Sina’s for school.

The man noticed him and gave him a wave before he could duck away from the window. Jean waved back, he could practically hear his mother shaking her head. _Amateur_. Jean’s mother was the champion of spying on neighbours undetected. 

“Do you need some help with the boxes?” Jean called down, hiding his cigarette below the windowsill and trying his best to innocent. The boy turned at the sound of his voice, sparing his father a quick glance before he tipped his head back to look at Jean.

“Thanks, but I think we can manage.” The man said, moving past his son with a box in his arms and shooting a friendly smile up to Jean. Jean wasn’t paying attention, he was too busy staring after the boy, who’d moved to pick up one end of a sofa with the girl and was backing into the house with it. A few minutes later the boy appeared in the attic window opposite Jean and cracked the window open. Jean gaped.

Okay, so it wasn’t a hot girl with privacy issues, but Jean was fairly convinced that a scruffy haired boy with incredibly green eyes was a fair trade off.

\-----------

Their surname was Jaeger. Jean found that out when some of their post got delivered to his house. The letter was addressed to Carla, and he supposed that Carla probably wasn’t the dark haired boy’s name and was either the mother’s or the name of the pretty girl with the black hair. His mother had come back with gossip from the post office that the girl was an orphan, adopted by the Jaegers when she was young. Jean was relieved, he had been scared that she was the boy’s girlfriend.

Jean’s investigation continued.

It became apparent that neither the boy nor the girl had been enrolled in St Sina’s, much to Jean’s disappointment, but there was always time. Jean lived in hope. Maybe they were going to start after the summer break. After all, he never saw the boy leaving the house in a school uniform. Actually, he barely ever saw the boy leave the house. He spent a lot of time smoking out his bedroom window with music playing loud enough that Jean could hear it as he came up the lane from school. Once, he’d flicked his cigarette butt at Jean as he was walking past. Whether it was an accident or not, Jean wasn’t sure. Either way, the boy had apologised in an attractive voice and Jean had decided that he was a bit of an ass.

They sometimes caught each other whilst smoking out their respective windows, but didn’t speak. The boy always stared down the lane, and Jean always stared at him. He was so cute, _he was so cute_. Jean felt like he should declare his crush outside a window with a boom box and a homemade banner. _Mystery boy, I am smitten._ Dark skinned and slight, with a shock of dark brown hair. He smoked expensive cigarettes, probably Marlboros. He looked like a menthol kinda guy. Jean smoked cheap cigarettes he rolled himself on his bedroom desk, and lived in constant fear of his parents finding out. The boy looked like he never lived in fear of anything. Loose limbed and lazy, he didn’t lean, he _lounged_ against the windowsill, green eyes sleepy and posture slack.

Every day, Jean’s mother brought home new gossip from the village. In a community as small as Trost, nothing stayed a mystery for long. The man who Jean had talked to the day the Jaegers had moved in was Dr. Grisha, and he commuted two hours to the city every day for work. The woman was Carla, who was apparently part Turkish and worked part time at the grocers. _Part Turkish_. Jean stored that piece of information for later use. That explained the boy’s olive toned skin, which was looking darker every day as summer crept up. For someone who did a lot of lying around in his room, the boy was getting a great tan.

Connie and Sasha came over after school one day to catch a glimpse of the object of Jean’s often misplaced affections. The boy was smoking pot out his window with his adopted sister, who gave them a wave when Sasha did. 

“He’s cute.” She commented, flopping down on the floor of Jean’s room. Connie looked betrayed.

“No he’s not!” He protested, but Sasha was speaking over him.

“Plus, he obviously has reliable weed connections.” She looked wistful. “I wonder who he’s buying from.”

Jean shrugged, slightly paranoid that the boy and his sister were listening in on them. “Connie, put some music on?”

Connie complained, still stung over Sasha’s betrayal, but sorted through Jean’s CDs until he found something and put it on. 

“I don’t even know his name.” Jean grumbled. No matter how much snooping around he did, no matter how much gossip his mother relayed to him, the boy remained nameless. They’d never received any post that was supposed to go to him, and none of the women in the village ever seemed to mention him. He was an enigma wrapped in a mystery. He repeated this to Sasha and Connie. 

“Maybe you could steal their post.” Sasha supplied unhelpfully. “I mean, everyone gets post, even if it’s just crap from school.”

Connie rolled his eyes as Jean began to consider it. “Or you could just, I dunno, ask him? I know, crazy idea, but hey, communicating has been quite popular for years now. Meanwhile, tampering with people’s post is a crime.”

“I wouldn’t be tampering.” Jean said huffily. The thought of actually talking to the boy was more than a little terrifying. “Just looking.”

“I’ll ask him then.” Sasha said with resolve. 

“No!“ Jean tried to grab her legs as she moved to the window, but he was too late. She was leaning out the window and calling across the lane before he could move.

“Hello, hi, what’s your name?”

Jean dropped his face into his hands and groaned. He heard the boy reply, “Who, me?” Sasha must have nodded then, because Jean heard a laugh - _oh god, his laugh_ \- and the boy said, “Eren. It’s Eren.”

Sasha chirped back a friendly “thanks!” before settling back into her place underneath the window. She fixed Jean with a bright smile. Jean was having a religious experience.

“Eren.” He muttered, then grinned. It was perfect, _of course_ , Eren. Eren Jaeger. Mystery boy had a _name_ and it was perfect. “Sasha, I could kiss you.” He said in reverence.

“Steady on.” Connie said warningly, and Sasha just laughed.

“Eren.” She said.

Jean nodded. “Eren Jaeger.”

\--------

Jean made first contact with Eren Jaeger on the hottest afternoon of the year. Jean walked home with Connie, as usual, blazer and tie stuffed in his backpack and shirt undone to his chest. He said goodbye to Connie at his turnoff and walked the rest of the way home alone, slow and lethargic from the heat.

Eren was hanging out his window smoking when Jean got in, chest bare and hair sticking up like he’d only just got out of bed. A bead of sweat ran down the centre of Jean’s back. He wondered if Eren’s room was sweltering like his in the summer, or whether Eren just couldn’t be bothered to get dressed. 

Jean gave him a wave when he cracked open his own window, to which Eren replied with a nod. The slight breeze was incredible - Jean’s room felt like the seventh circle of hell after being shut up all day. He breathed in the smell of the sea and lit up, watching Eren watch the road. The lane wasn’t very big, he thought, he and Eren could easily have a conversation across it. They were close enough that Jean could hear the music playing from Eren’s room, even. It was The Smiths, Hatful of Hollow, and Eren had taken to not playing his music as loud as he used to. Jean wondered if Eren was wearing anything below that windowsill.

He slumped down until his chin was resting on his free arm, the other hanging out the window so he didn’t get too much smoke in his room. He gathered his courage. “Hey.” He called across.

Eren looked his way, expression puzzled. “Hello.” Jean watched the way his muscles moved smoothly under his dark skin as he raised his cigarette to his lips. He was half lying against the windowsill, posture lazy and loose, arms hanging down past the sill to drum against the brick side of the house. Jean could smell that he was smoking pot from where he was standing.

“My name’s Jean.” He plucked at the front of his school shirt, trying to get some air to his skin. He didn’t really want to strip off in front of Eren.

“I know.” Eren sounded amused. “We get your post sometimes.” When he spoke, smoke streamed from his nose and lips.

Jean nodded and pretended to look down the lane whilst watching Eren from the corner of his eyes. He was grinning across at him, lopsided and amused.

“Do you wanna stop staring at me?” His tone was light and Jean flipped him off. He wasn’t staring.

“I’ve never seen you at school.” He said instead of replying. Now he’d smelt Eren’s pot he was itching for a joint. He regarded his cigarette with dissatisfaction and took a drag.

“Nah.” Eren stretched languidly, yawning and righting himself before propping his elbows on the sill. “I go to St. Maria’s.” He scratched his stomach sleepily and tapped ash into his front garden.

Jean nodded. Eren took a lungful of smoke and held it. Jean counted, one, two, three, four…

“Where do you go?” Eren asked tightly, still holding his smoke.

“St Sina.” Jean grinned as Eren laughed and coughed, smoke leaving his lungs gracelessly. “We’re rivals.”

“Fuckin’ a.” Eren said, shaking his head and grinning down the road. He had a very white smile.

Jean finished his cigarette in silence, mentally congratulating himself on talking to Eren Jaeger, possible love of his life. Before long, Jean could hear this mother calling from downstairs, his sisters joining in with their shrill little kid voices. “I’ve gotta go.” He called across to Eren.

“Okay.” Eren said.

“We should talk again.” Jean said, feeling brave.

Eren shot him a lazy smirk. “Okay.” He said.

\----------

Eren was the sort of guy who left his curtains open at night, and Jean was the sort of guy who suffered from insomnia on a regular basis. Jean could see straight into Eren’s room, and the thought of Eren sleeping right below the windowsill set Jean’s heart thumping beneath his breastbone. He grumbled at himself and pushed his hair back from his sweaty forehead.

It was a warm night. The sort of summer warmth that made the tarmac smell hot and cloying, and Jean couldn’t sleep because of the heat and the way his brain kept ticking over. Instead, he sat shirtless by his window and chain smoked, brooding over his possible academic failures and pointedly trying not to look through Eren’s open windows.

Except how he completely was. Practically glaring into the darkness of the room opposite, actually. His mind kept sticking on the image of Eren, lazy and warm from the sun, shirtless and smoking out his window. He exhaled sharply, and scrubbed his eyes with the heel of the hand holding his cigarette. The clock shone a fluorescent _1:40_ accusingly at him, and Jean’s eyes felt raw and gritty from lack of sleep. 

He heard the sound of a lamp clicking on before he registered the soft light - mind too busy wandering in that glazed way which came with insomnia. The sound was loud as a gunshot in the silent lane and Jean found himself squinting at the sudden light. A slightly rumpled-looking Eren stuck his head over the windowsill to give him a curious look.

“What are you doing?” He hissed across, voice too alert for someone who had seemed to be asleep. Jean blinked, trying to clear the light spots burned into his eyes.

“Can’t sleep.” He whisper-called back, leaning forward a little. The empty space between their windows seemed to narrow to no more than ten feet when Eren gave him a grin through the darkness.

“Same.” He said, and his upper body appeared above the windowsill now as he heaved himself up using his arms. “Wanna do something?” 

“Like what.” Jean said, staring at a point just slightly below Eren, brain slowing and settling. His eyelids drooped. “It’s like, two in the morning.” He kept his voice low so he didn’t wake his sisters in the room below him.

Eren was a silhouette at the window, a shadow of a boy with overgrown hair and skinny shoulders. “We could go swimming?”

The thought of washing the almost feverish heat from his skin made Jean snap his head up at the suggestion. “Okay.” He whispered back, heart still thumping strangely. He clapped a hand over it. _Can I die from insomnia?_ He wondered.

Eren had climbed out of bed, and was standing next to it. The light from the lamp washed over his dark skin and picked out his muscles in high contrast to the shadows pooling between his boyish pecs and stomach muscles. Jean couldn‘t look away, and became aware by degrees that Eren wasn’t wearing anything at all. 

“I’ll meet you outside.” Eren called across, tearing Jean’s attention away from the coarse line of hair on Eren’s flat belly and the sharp lines of his hips.

Jean nodded slowly, and groped his way around his room in the darkness, looking for shoes and a pair of shorts. His mind was like a stuck record, settling jarringly on how Eren had rested his hand on his stomach just then, fingers splayed and relaxed on the bare skin. _Stupid_.

Jean tripped over his schoolbag on the floor, landing with a thump and a piteous groan. He lay there for a second, ears straining for any noise from downstairs, before gathering himself together and creeping down the stairs and out the front door.

Eren was already out front by the time Jean quietly closed the front door behind him and went to meet him in the middle of the lane. He didn’t miss the way Eren’s eyes flicked quickly over his bare chest, and hunched his shoulders self consciously. Eren wasn’t wearing a shirt either, and again, the image of his hand poised on his stomach flashed through Jean’s mind.

“Let’s go then.” Eren said quietly, tipping his head to the side with an expression Jean couldn’t make out in the darkness. Jean just nodded dumbly and set out for the direction of the beach, looking back once to check that Eren was following him.

“Have you been to the beach yet?” He asked in a low voice, not wanting to disturb the stillness of the night. He caught Eren’s expression now that they were out of the lane and onto the road with streetlamps. He was grinning, looking tired and amused and Jean frowned. “What?”

“Yeah, duh?” Eren stretched his arms over his head and yawned, and Jean watched the smooth slide of wiry muscles as he did so. “You don’t just move to a place like this and not go to the beach.” He added, his tone teasing.

Jean huffed. “Alright, just trying to make conversation.” Talk about a bad attitude. They walked in silence to the end of the road until they got to a set of steps leading down onto the beach. For such a hot night, the sand was surprisingly cool under Jean’s feet when he pulled his shoes off and left them perched on a rock. Eren followed his lead, then stripped his shorts off as well. “What are you doing?” Jean asked, alarmed, and was answered by a smirk from Eren.

“What do you think?” He took a couple of steps towards the sea, until the surf was lapping his toes. “I’m going swimming.” He gave Jean a challenging look, chin tilted up and expression lost in the darkness. “Coming?”

Jean fiddled with the waistband of his shorts, not wanting to lose face in front of Eren, but also not wanting to get his _dick_ out in front of him. He kept his eyes resolutely on Eren’s face. “Yeah, I‘m coming.”

They stood and stared at each other, Jean’s hands still on the waistband of his shorts. Eren snorted. “What, you chickenshit to get your dick out?”

Jean glared at him. “No, go fuck yourself.”

Eren gave him a blank look, then shrugged and stepped further into the sea. “Whatever, suit yourself.”

Jean watched him walk into the water until the waves were breaking over his thighs, his hips, his chest. A tightness had settled into his stomach and was lodged there and Jean was way too tired for this, way too confused for this. “Fuck you!” He shouted, his words partially obscured by the waves and his own nerves. There was no heat to them. Eren was up to his neck in the water, drifting. When the lamp from the lighthouse swung around, Jean saw that his were eyes closed.

“Promise I won’t look.” Eren called back, not opening his eyes and ignoring Jean’s comment. “Scouts honour.”

Jean stripped off his shorts, regretting the decision not to throw on any underwear, and sighed as he stepped into the surf. It was cold on his overheated skin and Jean sank into it as soon as it was deep enough. It felt strange, swimming naked, and even stranger to be swimming naked with a boy he barely knew. He looked over to where Eren was floating and was unsurprised to see his eyes open and trained on Jean.

“Did you look?” Jean asked, the current pulling them together. His outstretched foot brushed against Eren’s thigh, and he drew his legs close to his chest so they didn’t touch. 

“Yeah.” Eren murmured, ducking his head under the water quickly and resurfacing with a sigh. His scruffy mop of hair was plastered to his neck and forehead, and he ran a hand through it to squeeze some of the water out.

“You promised, asshole.” Jean said reproachfully, stretching his legs until his feet found the bottom again. His face felt too hot against the rest of his now-cool body, so he followed Eren’s lead and ducked his head under the water. When he resurfaced, Eren was grinning lazily and salt water ran down his face to collect in the part of his lips. “Scouts honour.” Jean said.

“I have no honour.” Eren said jokingly, and his eyes lit up so green as the lighthouse’s lamp swept over the sea. In a second, they were black again, and Jean needed to blink until his eyes readjusted themselves. “And I never went to Scouts.”

Eren’s shoulder bumped against his own, and Jean didn’t shy away from it that time. The light went by again, lighting them up for an instant before plunging them back into darkness. Jean didn’t miss the way Eren’s eyes had been zeroed in on his mouth in that moment.

They soaked in the water for a long time, Jean straying out past his depth and Eren sticking stubbornly to where his feet could touch the bottom. It felt good, the salt drying stiff on his skin, burning his eyes and cooling him down. Jean couldn’t imagine not living near the coast, not being able to hear the waves at all hours of the day. He repeated this to Eren, when they bumped back into each other, Jean pulled by the current and the way the slope of Eren’s nose looked in the near-darkness.

“I’ve never lived somewhere so beautiful.” Eren murmured, and Jean wondered if he always spoke like that, or whether it was because it was dark and late and the saltwater was going to both their heads. Jean just nodded and bumped his shoulder against Eren’s, slick and goose pimpled under the water. Eren gave him a long, appraising look, and Jean looked away.

“What do you want from me?” Eren asked challengingly, the space between them small and intimate. His fingers curled around Jean’s wrist, anchoring him in place.

“What?” Jean said, trying to sound clueless. A piece of seaweed caught on his shin, and he shivered. Eren’s fingers were like a vice around his wrist.

“ _Me_.” Eren said, bringing his hand out of the water with a splash to gesture around. “Swimming with me, staring at me. You’re always _looking_.”

“I don’t even know you.” Jean said, then maybe because it was so early that dawn was threatening to break, and because it was dark and his head had been so full of Eren Jaeger for weeks now, he said, “I want this, I guess.”

“What does that even mean?” Eren asked with a hint of irritation colouring his tone and Jean closed his eyes, because this _wasn’t how it was supposed to go_. He meant that he wanted _this_ , the water lapping at the hollow of Eren’s throat, the taste of salt on his lips, the warm closeness that Jean would never have expected. He couldn’t vocalise it, he could only put a hand to Eren’s shoulder to curve his body towards him. He could only cup the back of Eren’s head and watch as Eren’s eyes fluttered shut almost smugly. He could only kiss lips that tasted like the sea he’d lived with forever. 

Eren barely reacted. A cursory, soft press of lips against Jean’s - more curious than anything, before he was breaking away, expression careful. His grip tightened spasmodically on Jean’s wrist, and Jean let his fingers slip from Eren’s shoulder. “Jean…” Eren’s voice was soft and low, intimate in the dark space between their mouths. He hesitated, and when the lighthouse lamp swept around once again, his expression was unreadable. Jean blinked salt from his eyelashes and flicked his tongue out against his lip, tasting seawater and Eren.

“Sorry.” He muttered, and was surprised when Eren brought his hands to grasp hold of his shoulders. “Eren? Sorry?”

Eren butted his head against Jean’s neck and let out a little huff which could’ve been a laugh. “Don’t fucking apologise when you kiss someone, asshole.” He made another noise then, definitely a laugh this time. “Really ruins the mood.” His hands were cool on Jean’s shoulders, and twitched when he stretched up to tip Jean’s face down for a kiss.

“Who’re you calling an asshole, prick?” Jean mumbled they broke apart and Eren was grinning through the darkness at him, all traces of hesitation gone. 

“Don’t fuckin’ start.” Eren warned, pinching the skin of his neck briefly to make Jean yelp. “Private school boy.”

Feeling giddy from lack of sleep and the taste of Eren in his mouth, Jean caught Eren around the waist to dunk him under the water, smiling and laughing when Eren resurfaced with a vengeful look on his face and arms already outstretched to take Jean down. He’d never felt so awake. They kissed underwater, salt burning Jean’s eyes when he forced them open to see the silvery bubbles of their breath stream to the surface. _He’d never felt so awake._

\---------

Later, he and Eren walked back with sandy feet and hair dripping wet and cold down their backs. Eren kept touching his lips, which was sweet, but all Jean could think of was how mad his parents were going to be when they caught him sneaking back in.

“My parents are gonna kill me.” He muttered, tipping his head back to gaze up at the pink dawn that was breaking. Eren made an inquisitive noise next to him. “My dad gets up early for work, he’s gonna catch me coming in.” Jean explained.

“Oh.” Eren was silent for a minute as they turned off the main road and began the ascent up the hill to their houses. The lane was quiet and still and they walked slowly, dragging their feet and eyelids drooping with tiredness. “You can stay at mine until you can go back, if you want.” Eren didn’t make the offer sound awkward, despite what had just happened between them on the beach. 

It felt very natural for Jean to flick his gaze sideways to meet Eren’s, and to say, “Okay, thanks.”

Eren just shrugged one shoulder lazily, brushing off Jean’s thanks and tipping a smile his way. “My dad has to leave really early for work, and my mum has the morning shift.” Jean nodded, storing that little bit of information away.

The inside of Eren’s house was a lot tidier than Jean’s, but that was only to be expected with minus two little sisters messing the place up. Overall, it was uninspiring. It looked almost identical to Jean’s house, really. Eren left his shoes at the door and held a finger to his lips as they crept past his parents’ room and up the rickety flight of stairs to Eren’s attic bedroom.

The room was dark, and Jean hit his head almost immediately on the sharply sloping roof. Eren laughed at him before stepping sure-footedly across the room to turn on his bedside lamp. The room was immediately bathed in a warm, yellow glow, and Jean raised his eyebrows at the mess.

“Wow, this is a pigsty.” He commented, scanning the place from his safe spot by the door. There wasn’t an inch of floor that wasn’t covered with strewn clothes and dirty mugs or plates. He met Eren’s gaze and grimaced. “You’re gross.”

“Leave, then.” Eren suggested from where he was sitting on the side of his bed, brushing the sand off his feet. “Or you could come over here and get some sleep.”

Jean considered the floor, then shrugged. Frankly, it was worth stepping on a dirty plate if he could stretch out in Eren’s bed and close his aching eyes.

Eren stripped off his shorts as Jean stepped gingerly across the room, but thankfully kept his underwear on. He waited until Jean was sitting on the edge of the mattress before leaning to switch the lamp off. Jean blinked in the sudden darkness, and shuffled back on the bed until skin touched skin, and he laid down.

Eren was warm under the sheets, and Jean wondered if it would be okay to curl around him, maybe rest his fingers along his ribcage, his face in that mop of damp dark hair. Jean’s own skin felt sticky and stiff from salt, and he could feel the damp patch his hair was leaving on the pillow, blessedly cool in contrast to the stuffiness of the room. He kicked the blankets off of himself, and tossed and turned until Eren made a sound of annoyance.

“We have school in the morning, fuckwad, let me get some sleep.” There was no real bite to his words, but for the first time all night Eren sounded tired.

“You barely even go to school.” Jean retorted in a quiet voice, and then they were silent. Jean stared at the sky through Eren’s open window, trying to spot the faint sliver of the moon against the dawn sky. If there was only one thing to be grateful for about living in the middle of nowhere, it was the lack of light pollution. 

He and Eren didn’t speak again. Soon enough, Eren’s breathing slowed and deepened, and Jean felt it was safe to roll over onto his side and stare at the strong line of Eren’s back, watch as his sides lifted and fell with each slow breath. He wondered if he’d get to kiss Eren again, or whether neither of them would mention this night again and just go back to steadily ignoring each other.

The room smelt of the sea and Jean could feel sand between the sheets and between his toes. Eren’s hair was damp and curling against the nape of his neck, and Jean wanted to press a kiss to it so badly the urge was almost physical. He wanted to pull Eren to face him, wanted to wrap his hands around his wrists and kiss him until Jean couldn’t taste salt water in his mouth anymore.

His eyes skipped down the strong expanse of his back, settling on his small waist. It was very weird to think that if he were to reach out and touch Eren, he’d be all sharp angles and lean muscles. A boy. Jean couldn’t even pretend that he was attracted to Eren because he was girly-looking. He had skinny shoulders, a narrow waist, a flat, hard chest. Even with those big green eyes, he couldn’t fool himself. Not a single part of Eren was feminine, and Jean supposed that was okay. Eren was a boy, Jean was lying in bed with a boy, and that was okay.

Jean wondered if Eren had ever kissed a boy before. Probably. Jean hadn’t. He liked it though, kissing boys. Or maybe it was just kissing Eren he liked. It was different from kissing girls. He wondered what Eren would be like if they fucked, whether he’d like it hard or fast or slow. He stretched out a hand in the gap between their bodies, fingertips an inch away from Eren’s dark skin.

When his fingers skated over Eren’s ribs, he jerked awake, making a sleepy, frustrated sound and rolling over to face Jean. Jean’s eyes were adjusted to the dark by then, and he let his gaze rove over Eren’s half-awake features. He was softer like that, eyes half-lidded and mouth relaxed. “What th’ fuck.” He mumbled, sounding a little pissed off. His eyes drooped again, and Jean watched, rapt. “Why’re you still ‘wake?” 

“I don’t get to sleep too easily.” Jean’s hand was still resting on Eren’s ribcage, his thumb just below one brown nipple. “My brain doesn’t,” He raised his hand from Eren’s ribs to tap his temple, “Turn off.”

Eren shifted to shove his arm under his pillow, and yawned. “Okay.” He murmured, and his eyes were heavy on Jean’s, boring into him through the dark. Jean settled his hand on Eren’s hip, and thought again, _boy, you’re touching a boy._ “So, what, you want a handjob or something?”

Jean jerked his gaze up from Eren’s hip. “What?” He spluttered, “Excuse me?” He knew he must have sounded like a real tool, but all a sudden Eren was all up in his personal space, warm and languid, breath fanning across Jean’s throat in a way which made him shiver. 

“It’ll help you sleep.” Eren murmured, and cupped Jean’s jaw to tilt his face down for a kiss. It was incredibly different to kissing him in the sea, on the beach, walking home. It was a lot more intimate when sea water wasn’t getting in their mouths or their hands weren’t slipping on each others’ skin. Kissing in a bed was a lot more intimate, so warm and close and _vertical_. Jean shuffled back a little as Eren bit on his lower lip, embarrassed by how hard he’d gotten at just the thought.

“No, you’re alright.” Jean mumbled when Eren drew back from his lips, which was a crying shame, really. He slid his hands through Eren’s tangle of damp dark hair, and swallowed when Eren sighed and tipped his head into his hand. He tugged lightly, guiding Eren’s lips back to his own, and didn’t miss the tiny noise in the back of Eren’s throat as he did so. When Eren pressed closer to him, hands curling around Jean’s waist, he was half-surprised to realise Eren was hard as well. 

“Okay.” Eren whispered, pressing his palm flat against Jean’s chest and pushing him back a little. His hand was hot and slightly sweaty, and Jean felt a little smug over how he was affected Eren too. “If you’re saying no, I’m going back to sleep.”

Jean blinked, eyes burning and brain slow. “Alright.”

“Let’s spoon though.” Eren said seriously, a touch self-conscious as he wiggled out of Jean’s grasp and turned his back to him. “You’re taller so you’re the big spoon.”

“Yeah…okay.” Jean muttered, stupefied. He curled his arms around Eren and waited with gritted teeth as he moved around and got comfortable. “Take your time.” He whispered tightly, as Eren pressed back against him. “Sorry, I’m hard.” He muttered, hiding his face in Eren’s hair in embarrassment. He smelt like saltwater and shampoo and Jean relaxed against him.

“It’s okay, me too.” Eren muttered back, and finished with a long yawn which set off Jean yawning as well. “Don’t wake me up again.” Eren said finally, his body going limp against Jean’s as he relaxed. 

Jean traced his fingers over Eren’s abdominal muscles and watched as the sky gradually lightened through the window.

\------------

It wasn’t awkward in the morning. Jean woke up feeling fuzzy headed but pleased that he’d eventually drifted off at some point. A glance at the clock told him he was late for school, which was okay, and the sound of the shower downstairs told him Eren had gotten up early to wash. Or at least, Jean thought so. He wasn’t in bed anyway. Jean woke in sandy sheets to a folded up t-shirt on the pillow next to him. He slipped it on and kneeled so he could see out of the window. His parents’ cars were gone, and he rested his chin on his folded arms as he stared down the lane. It was strange seeing it from Eren’s side of the lane, like the world had flipped. 

“You’re finally up.”

Eren _had_ been for a shower. His hair was wet and towelled rough, and a droplet of water was making it’s way down his chest to his bellybutton. Jean remembered kissing his chest at some point last night, remembered the feel of sand under his tongue, and licked his lips quickly. “It’s only ten.” He said, voice rough. “I thought you were gonna be ‘late for school’, or something.” When he raised his hands to make air quotes, Eren’s eyes followed them and he laughed.

“I was just saying that so you’d shut it.” He said easily, and just as easily he dropped his towel to the floor and pulled a pair of boxers on from the floor. Jean raised his eyebrows and turned back to look out the window. _Way too familiar._

“I’m gonna skip too.” Jean muttered, absently running his fingers over the burn marks in Eren’s windowsill. Jean figured he was the type to put his cigarettes out on whatever surface was handy. He made a mental note not to let Eren smoke in his room - and stopped himself. Was this going to be a thing now? Jean half-hoped so. Eren seemed sort of abrasive and teasing, but Jean found it equal parts annoying and amusing. 

“Cool.” Jean heard a rustle of clothes, and when he turned back around Eren was disappointingly dressed. “Let’s skip together, we can go back to the beach?” There was a hint of uncertainty in his voice, and Jean smirked and shrugged.

“Maybe I’ve got other stuff to do.” He said, moving to sit cross-legged in the centre of Eren’s bed and doing his best not to look as tired as he felt. 

“Yeah, right.” Eren was grinning, and he stepped through the crap on his floor to sit next to Jean on the bed. “C’mon, I’ll sneak you out the back so Mikasa doesn’t think we’re sleeping together.”

Jean kissed him, slightly disappointed that he no longer had the familiar scent of the sea on him. Eren responded eagerly, curling his fingers into Jean’s hair and tilting his face up to gain better access to his mouth. His tongue flicked across Jean’s lower lip, followed by a nip of teeth, and Jean grinned into the kiss. Their teeth clacked together, and Eren withdrew with a disgruntled look on his face. “You’re a horrible kisser.” He said.

“You were better last night, to be honest.” Jean shot back, his hand fisted in the back of Eren’s t-shirt to keep him close. He could never have imagined those window-to-window conversations leading to this - Eren kneeling at his side with his hands tangled in his hair, looking tired and attractive in the cool morning sunlight. “Better in the sea.”

“Alright.” Eren said, like it was fucking challenge. He tilted his chin up, a certain light in his eyes that told Jean he had made a terrible mistake. “Let’s go then, Kirschtein.”

Jean learned two things that morning. One, that Eren took pseudo-challenges very seriously, and two, that kissing in the sea at ten in the morning was just as good as at three.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah...more erejeans at the beach...sorry for this (i'm afraid it's really ooc i'm sorry if it is wow) i'm feeling a bit beach-homesick and this is kinda set where i live etc etc so like. this is completely self-indulgent.
> 
> comments and kudos appreciated it's kinda late here so there's probably some mistakes pls point any out if you spot them!! thanks for reading!!
> 
> come hmu on tumblr i'm girlshinji if u wanna talk about erejeans


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